The Final Fight, Apathy or Victory, Your Choice
You know, a lot is said about the "new generation" in CDC. They are often called the "Pepsi Generation", the "Pepper Spray Generation" etc.... In fact, being that I only have ten years in I am often lumped in with that very demographic by some of the older, saltier war hogs that still hump the tiers.
What I can attest to is this. In my short 10 years I have seen things change and I cant really say any of its been for the better. The thing I have seen the most is the collapse of "Camaraderie". When I started at Calipatria State Prison, my first partner (who happens to be here on face book, badge number 49292) looked at me when I walked into the building and walked right past me saying "when they come back from chow, lock em up", that was it, trial by fire, first day, first minute. I did and it was nuts. But as I earned my own bones on the yard those same Vets started to show me things, train me and trust me. Soon I saw a brotherhood born in blood and danger develop that was not unlike what I had experienced in the Marine Corps and I actually enjoyed getting up every morning to go to work in a Level 4 prison knowing full well I would probably get jumped or see a partner hurt. But after those said incidents I could depend on the fact that my partners and their families would be their for mine and I would do the same for them.
I was never a big "union guy" but I kept abreast of issues that mainly affected our local work conditions. For my first 5 years I could not have picked out our State Wide President or anyone else on the street. I was mainly concerned about my friends, my yard and our life. Then, OIA came knocking and I got my first real taste of "real brotherhood" and "real betrayal" and my friend list shrunk immensely, as it got purged of those that claimed to be there for better or worse but were no where to be found when the rounds started coming down range.
Having your career, your position, your life and possibly your freedom threatened and attacked behind false allegations can go along way to making a "Union Activist" and for me, it lit a fire that no one could put out, even if I was sometimes wrong.
I began to fight every battle, no matter how small and no matter how trivial. I fought them like they were battles for absolute survival and I didn't care if I burnt bridges along the way because I was blowing them up. I pledged to not let any attack or injustice dealt to any partner go unanswered or be swept under a rug. I often would put myself and my families security at great risk fighting those very fights and there were some times that i was either wrong or misinformed and had to have my ass pulled out of the fire for what I had done in protest. I quickly got a name for being a "torpedo" like Mikey, who would eat anything. I would walk into any office, any forum any place no matter how private or public and create a scene that would demand some attention be paid to whatever was taking place. Along that road, I would often look behind me and see the "mob" that originally pledged support through the battle had again dissipated and I would be facing what ever I had created, alone. Along the way, I did some people wrong that didn't deserve it and I can never take any of that back.
Soon, the department knew who i was, the state knew who I was, Wardens knew, staff knew and the there were two types of people in this world, People that Loved Ian Pickett and People that Hated Ian Pickett. Often, I didn't know either of them personally but it would effect my life in almost every way.
I got lucky and met a guy that started to teach me to "calm down". To still fight but to choose my battles and put all my effort into battles that mattered, without him, I would have probably been fired over a year ago. No matter what, I can always look behind me and he is still there not only for me but for my family as well and THAT is a true friend, a true partner.
So where am I going with all of this? I will tell you. I am tired, not so much physically and not even so much mentally. I am tired of giving everything I have and seeing others do it as well and having people call into question my "intentions" for doing such things. I am tired of people trying to say we or I, do what we do to further our own personal goals and nothing else. I am tired of being labeled an abuser because I finally had to ask for assistance, the very same assistance that I fought tooth and nail to see that everyone else was afforded in a fair and impartial manner.
That same person that took me under their wing has also taught me that no matter what, people are going to question your intent, "their still going to talk" and I understand that now and I am cool with it because, I no longer care. From now on I will help those that want to be helped and WANT TO HELP THEMSELVES. I will do it with the same ferocity and stubbornness that I always have because helping people is what truly makes me happy. I have seen a lot of pain inflicted in this world on many different lands and in some cases I have been the deliverer of that pain and I just want to help people succeed, nothing else, nothing more. Along the way, I intend on making sure my true friends and family are well taken care of to.
So listen up. No matter how you feel about me or what you think about what I do. You all will soon face things like 12 hour shifts, a Governor that is up to YOU to choose, a department that will be up to you to mold. Your lives, your sanity and your safety depend on the success of how YOU all handle it. I took a week of vacation earlier this year to walk around the prison registering people to vote, I cant do that anymore. Its up to you to register, its up to you to vote and it will be up to you to fight.
I will respect your right as an American to vote how you choose. I will respect however you guys decide to handle the impending 12 hour shift battle. I will respect whatever you guys do as long as you guys finally UNITE and DO IT TOGETHER!
Its time that everyone ask themselves who the true ABUSERS are. Is it the guy that calls in sick a lot, the guy that is on Catastrophic Leave, the guy that goes around starting trouble? Or, is it the guy that sits back, bitches and moans, does so from the very safe and secure environment that those out their fighting provide, yet never once, steps out in an effort to help provide it himself?
One man or a small group of men can make a difference and be remembered as such after they die but a UNION, a collective effort of partners setting out to do whats best for everyone involved can be remembered as FOUNDERS, REVOLUTIONISTS AND HERO'S. Your fate, is in your hands and its up to you to effect positive change for you and your families lives.
Be safe
Ian Pickett
p.s. Thank you to all that have helped me, I cannot thank you enough. And to those that I have offended over the years, I apologize to about 50%. I figure that is about the amount that didn't have it coming and got caught up in my fury of doing what i thought was right "by any means necessary".
No comments:
Post a Comment